The Waters of Belen

An image comes to mind whenever I think of how God sees sin. I am taken back to about a year ago when I had my first taste of the jungle. Iquitos, Peru is a city located right on the Amazon river, and at the river's edge, there is an area of town known as Belen. (I remember finding this name ironic since it is the Spanish translation of Bethlehem.) Belen is home to the poorest of Iquitos' occupants. It is literally on the river with houses that float. The delta-like area rises and falls each season with the river bringing the houses up with it. The water is the street, yard, playground, and common area of the community. It is also the sewer. Belen's water is filthy. It stinks. It literally made me gag the first time I went out on a boat from the pier to a home where we held a children's program. When I thought about all that went on in the water, my heart went out to the children who happily swam and played in the filth.

I think that must be how God feels toward us when we indulge in sin. He knows how filthy it is and how bad it is for us, and He is saddened that we choose to remain in it. Unlike the children of Belen, we have a choice. God has saved us and brought us into His "Boat". We don't need to remain in the filth of sin we were born into. When we choose to swim in it after our eyes have been opened to it's filth, we are like fools who would put on their nicest clothing and dive into sewage.

I find myself thinking of this a lot lately as God has confronted me about some areas of sin in my life. I am going through Romans, and I am being awakened to sins I didn't realize I committed. If I remain in them, I sadden God, because He has so much better for me than the sewer I was pulled from.

Tachael's Movin' In

So it's been about a month since my last post, and a lot has changed in my life. I am currently residing in CA with my brother and his family. I find myself looking for a job even as I am acting as nanny by choice. I am really enjoying it, even though it still feels like a vacation. It is like that whenever I move. It seems surreal for awhile, as if I may wake up the next morning and return to my previous home or way of life.

It is too early to miss anything of AZ yet, but I still miss Peru, and I know I will miss the rest of my family and my church soon. I am praying to get plugged in here soon, and discover why God has called me out here. I am sure He has something for me. He is so faithful and always comes through for me, often in ways I could never have planned or imagined.

I am already learning a lot about my niece and nephew. It is different when you live with children than when you visit them or they visit you. When you live with them, you have to set clear boundaries and expectations. You have to step back and let their parents be in charge without letting them think they can get away with murder when you are in charge. It's a fine line to walk, and I am praying to keep my balance so that I am not caught off guard by the 2- and 5-year-old who knock on my door at all times of day and night.

I love them so much, and I enjoy them more than I could say, so I am praying that we can find a way to live at peace without them being spoiled. :)

On being an adult.

I am now 22 years old. I feel as if this is a significant marker. Maybe I should have felt this way at 21, or 18. But I didn't. I suddenly find myself looking at my immediate future with a practical eye. Before, I often took on the far away future with plans and dreams. But now I realize, maybe because of maturity, or simply because my life has faced one change after another for the last two years, that I must make responsible adult decisions in order to be a responsible adult.

My family is going through a time of change right now, and that means my life is changing too, but I am reminded in such times how constant my God is.

The other day, I picked up my Bible and was going to turn to Romans, where I have been studying, but then decided to seek comfort in the book of Psalms. I read Psalm 86, not for the first time, but with new eyes. David's prayer became my own, as I imagined my spiritual battle, and remembered the attributes of God.

"(1) A Prayer of David. Incline Your ear, O LORD, and answer me; For I am afflicted and needy. (2) Preserve my soul, for I am a godly man; O You my God, save Your servant who trusts in You. (3) Be gracious to me, O Lord, For to You I cry all day long. (4) Make glad the soul of Your servant, For to You, O Lord, I lift up my soul. (5) For You, Lord, are good, and ready to forgive, And abundant in lovingkindness to all who call upon You. (6) Give ear, O LORD, to my prayer; And give heed to the voice of my supplications! (7) In the day of my trouble I shall call upon You, For You will answer me. (8) There is no one like You among the gods, O Lord, Nor are there any works like Yours. (9) All nations whom You have made shall come and worship before You, O Lord, And they shall glorify Your name. (10) For You are great and do wondrous deeds; You alone are God. (11) Teach me Your way, O LORD; I will walk in Your truth; Unite my heart to fear Your name. (12) I will give thanks to You, O Lord my God, with all my heart, And will glorify Your name forever. (13) For Your lovingkindness toward me is great, And You have delivered my soul from the depths of Sheol. (14) O God, arrogant men have risen up against me, And a band of violent men have sought my life, And they have not set You before them. (15) But You, O Lord, are a God merciful and gracious, Slow to anger and abundant in lovingkindness and truth. (16) Turn to me, and be gracious to me; Oh grant Your strength to Your servant, And save the son of Your handmaid. (17) Show me a sign for good, That those who hate me may see it and be ashamed, Because You, O LORD, have helped me and comforted me." - Psa 86:1-17 NASB

How amazing God is! And how quickly I forget. I was so stressed and confused about my situation, but this psalm brought me peace. It helped me remember that my plans are safe in the hands of the Lord, and that if my decision is to follow Him I cannot fail. I asked for "a sign for good" and He gave it to me. Now, I am moving in a new direction with my life, God as my guide. He has always come through for me, and I am choosing to trust in Him as I take each step in faith.