Saturday, March 23, 2013

Psalm51

Its been to long since my last post. And there is really no excuse for mylac lack of consistency. Except maybe to say that in order to write something really worth your time I find I must first do some real soul-searching self examination. That can be painful and ugly. And when tye results of such an exam are published it is alsi embarassing. Yet I feel as if perhaps by sharing my embarrassment I might comfort or encourage someone who feels the same way. And I find that I am blessed in the knowledge that I am nit alone in my struggles. so here it is. My self.I hope you can learn from me more than I seem to. This past few months I have found that I am very critical of people in my life that I know God has specifically called my to minister to. I find myself complaining and whining when I don't get time for the selfish things that consume large periods of time. I have repented of the sin as I see it. But I realize it is a trap I fall in too easily. This week I had a revelation as to why.I sonehow forgot that this life is not about me. Abd ministry is not about me. And jts really nit about those people either. Its about God. When I sin, I may suffer, but I don't sib against myselfs.And if others suffer I should asj for their forgiveness, but I am not really sinning against them either. I sin against God. So in the midst of my selfishness I have committed crimes against a holy God. I have not only put muself first. I have put Him last. Wheb King David killed Uriah because he had impregnated his wife, God sent Nathan to reveal David's sin to him. Distraught over his sin David cried out to Go in the 51st Psalm. Ge not only admitted his sin and need for forgiveness, but alsi recognized the neccesity of honesty. We need to be honest with ourselves and with God if we are going to accomplish His will in our lives. He will do the work of changing us but wr must be trule willing to be changed. That is my desire. I am planning to do great things by the power of the Holy Spirit. But I must be focused on God and put Him first if He is going to use me. Today I can honestly say that I am ready for that. But it will taje a continual glancing into the Mirror of the Word if I am to stay ready.